I’m not sure exactly how it happened but for years I had no strength in my legs. They almost seemed invisible, I mean I could feel them, they were just not responding or strong enough to lift my body up from the floor. I realize that my muscles were getting weaker because of lack of activity but I was still doing exercises, riding my bike almost daily and doing physical therapy so my muscles were not totally atrophied.
Then after my 5th stem cell treatment, sometime in May or June of 2015 I realized my legs were stronger. It’s amazing how habits are formed without even realizing it. Bad habits as well as good ones! Like when crossing my legs, I habitually lift my leg with my hand, even without thinking that sometimes I really have the strength to cross them without using my hand. Or when I get out of the car, I lift my leg to set it on the ground, without even giving my leg a try to independently step out of the car. Or trying to walk without pushing down on the handles of my walker. It’s just so much easier!
Back in August of 2013 I committed to walk regularly without using my hands to pick up my legs by pushing on my walker and now it’s over 2 years later and I am TOTALLY dependent on my walker to walk!
Moving anywhere (getting from point A to point B) takes so much time! And I don’t even have chronic pain to deal with, just time spent! I need to decide if it’s worth the time to practice walking with my legs instead of pushing down on my walker.
The truth is, no matter what I do, some MS symptoms seem to get worse. Now it’s this active lesion in my brain that influences my ability to sit up straight and stand. How many minutes should I spend exercising in hopes of having new pathways developed in my brain to move more quickly?
I can honestly say I happy! It doesn’t matter what my external circumstances are, I can choose to be happy! Buddha spoke the truth when he said, “It’s resistance to what is that causes suffering.” My friend, Andrea Garnes told me the other day, “Life is a game you have to keep on playing.” And it’s an adventure to watch how it all plays out!